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REBT Techniques – Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy

Rational emotive behavior therapy (REBT) was introduced by Albert Ellis in the 1950s. Through REBT you learn to recognize irrational beliefs and negative thought patterns that can lead to behavioral or emotional issues. When you have identified these patterns, you can learn to utilize REBT techniques to replace those irrational patterns with more rational thought patterns.

Rational emotive behavior therapy is a form of cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT). It’s an action-oriented therapeutic method that focuses on helping people deal with irrational beliefs so that they can manage their thoughts, emotions, and behaviors in a healthier, more realistic way.

When people have irrational beliefs about themselves or the world, it can cause problems. The goal of REBT is to help people identify and change those beliefs and negative patterns of thinking. This helps overcome psychological problems and mental disturbance.

As stated in REBT, our cognition, emotions, and behaviors are all connected. To be able to understand the effect of events and situations that people come across throughout their lives, it’s important to look at the beliefs that people have about these experiences and the emotions that emerge as a result of those beliefs.

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Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy

WHAT TO EXPECT FROM REBT

Core Principles of REBT

REBT is based on the idea that generally, people want to do well in life. People want to reach their goals and find happiness. However, sometimes irrational thoughts and feelings get in the way. These beliefs can influence how a person perceives circumstances and events. It is usually not for the better.

An Example

Imagine a situation where you have texted someone you’ve been dating for a month. You can tell that the person has seen the text but several hours have passed by without a reply. Then, the next day passes without a reply.

You might start to think that the person doesn’t want to reply because he or she doesn’t want to see you. You might also tell yourself that you did something wrong the last time you saw that person. Then you might begin to tell yourself that relationships never work out. Then you may come to the irrational conclusion that you will be alone for the rest of your life.

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The ABCs of REBT

This example above illustrates the core principles of REBT called the ABCs of REBT:

“A” refers to the Activating event or situation that produces a negative reaction or response. In the example, that is the lack of reply.
“B” refers to the beliefs or irrational thoughts about the event or situation. In the example, B is the belief that the person doesn’t want to see you anymore. Or that you’ve done something wrong and will be alone for the rest of your life.
“C” refers to the Consequences. Frequently, the consequences are the distressing emotions that come from irrational thoughts or beliefs. In our example, that might include feelings of not being good enough or being worthless.
In our story, REBT would aim at helping you to reexamine how you think about why the person didn’t respond to your text. Maybe he or she was just busy or just forgot to answer. It also may actually be that the person isn’t interested in dating you anymore. BUT, that doesn’t mean that there’s something wrong with you, OR that you will spend the rest of your life alone.

Applying the ABCs

During therapy, your therapist will help you learn how to apply the ABC model to your everyday life. If you’re feeling depressed due to a conflict with someone, your therapist may help you identify the activating event for your distress and then encourage you to figure out which beliefs brought on your negative feelings. You would then work with your therapist to change those beliefs and eventually, your emotional response to the conflict.

MYTHS ABOUT REBT THERAPY

Common Irrational Beliefs

In this process, an important step is recognizing the underlying beliefs that cause psychological distress. Many times, these are framed as “I must,” “I should,” or “I can’t.” The most common irrational beliefs include:

  • Being overly upset over the mistakes or misconduct of other people

  • Believing that you have to be proficient and successful in everything to have value and be worthwhile

  • Believing that your life would be happier if you just avoid the difficulties and challenges of life

  • Feeling like you have no control over your own happiness and that your contentment and joy depend on outside influences

Hanging on to unrelenting beliefs like these makes it almost impossible to respond to activating situations or events in a way that is healthy psychologically. Maintaining strict expectations of yourself and others only leads to disappointment, regret, and anxiety.

The Three Basic “Musts” of Irrational Thinking

Beliefs that end up in negative emotions are variations of three common irrational beliefs. Called “The Three Basic Musts,” these common irrational beliefs are based on demands about ourselves, about others, or about the environment.

They are:

  1. must do well to win the approval of others or else I’m no good.
  2. Other people must treat me fairly and kindly and in the way I want them to treat me. If they don’t, then they are not good people and deserve punishment.
  3. must always get what I want when I want it. And if I don’t, I’m miserable.

If a person doesn’t get “Must #1,” they usually feel anxious, depressed, shameful, or guilty. Regarding “Must #2,” if not treated fairly, they typically feel angry and may act out violently. As to “Must #3,” the person may feel self-pity and procrastinate.

Disputation

Going through a process called disputation is one step toward changing your beliefs. During disputation, your therapist will directly challenge your irrational beliefs. The therapist may challenge your beliefs head-on, causing you to rethink them. Alternatively, the therapist may ask you to imagine another point of view that hasn’t been considered yet. 

Instead of being warm and supportive in this process, therapists need to be blunt, honest, and logical to help push people toward changing their thoughts and behaviors. Disputation is designed to teach you life-long skills to help you manage your emotional responses and overall mental health. 

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    What are Some REBT Techniques?

    WHAT TO EXPECT DURING REBT THERAPY?

    There are three main types of REBT techniques that correspond with the ABCs of rational emotive behavior therapy. Different therapists might use a slightly different combination of REBT techniques depending on their past clinical experiences and their symptoms. The three types of REBT techniques are described below.

    Problem-Solving Techniques

    These address the activating event or situation (A). They include working to develop:

      • Problem-solving skills

      • Assertiveness

      • Social skills

      • Decision-making skills

      • Conflict resolution skills

      Cognitive Restructuring Techniques

      Cognitive processes are higher-level brain functions that include language, imagination, perception, and planning.

      These strategies help change irrational beliefs (B) and might include:

      • Problem-solving skills

      • Assertiveness

      • Social skills

      • Decision-making skills

      • Conflict resolution skills

      Coping Techniques

      Coping techniques help with managing the emotional consequences (C) of irrational thoughts.

      Examples of coping techniques include:

      • Relaxation

      • Hypnosis

      • Meditation

      No matter what techniques are used, your therapist will also probably give you work to do on your own between sessions. This way, you can apply the skills you learn to your daily life.

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      The Three Basic “Musts” of Irrational Thinking

      Beliefs that end up in negative emotions are variations of three common irrational beliefs. Called “The Three Basic Musts,” these common irrational beliefs are based on demands about ourselves, about others, or about the environment.

      They are:

      1. must do well to win the approval of others or else I’m no good.
      2. Other people must treat me fairly and kindly and in the way I want them to treat me. If they don’t, then they are not good people and deserve punishment.
      3. must always get what I want when I want it. And if I don’t, I’m miserable.

      If a person doesn’t get “Must #1,” they usually feel anxious, depressed, shameful, or guilty. Regarding “Must #2,” if not treated fairly, they typically feel angry and may act out violently. As to “Must #3,” the person may feel self-pity and procrastinate.

      Disputation

      Going through a process called disputation is one step toward changing your beliefs. During disputation, your therapist will directly challenge your irrational beliefs. The therapist may challenge your beliefs head-on, causing you to rethink them. Alternatively, the therapist may ask you to imagine another point of view that hasn’t been considered yet. 

      Instead of being warm and supportive in this process, therapists need to be blunt, honest, and logical to help push people toward changing their thoughts and behaviors. Disputation is designed to teach you life-long skills to help you manage your emotional responses and overall mental health. 

      THE GOALS OF REBT THERAPY

      Changing Behavior by Gaining Awareness

      A key part of the REBT process is replacing your irrational beliefs with healthier beliefs. This can be an intimidating and upsetting process, so it is normal to be concerned that you’ve made a mistake and to feel some discomfort. However, the aim of REBT is to help people learn to respond rationally to situations that would usually cause them to experience stress, depression, and other negative feelings.

      Main Insights of REBT

      According to Albert Ellis, these are the 3 main insights that REBT teaches:

      1. When a person understands and accepts that the main cause of his or her emotional reactions is his or her beliefs about an event instead of the event or situation itself. We get upset because of irrational beliefs.
      2. When a person picks up an irrational belief, he or she will hold onto that belief until he or she deals with it. And that’s what continues to upset that person in the present.
      3. Understanding these insights does not make us “better” than others. Understanding these beliefs and having insights into how they affect our emotional responses is not enough to cure us. The reality is that the best way to get better and stay better is to persistently work on identifying irrational beliefs, disputing them, changing our irrational “musts,” and changing negative emotions into positive ones.

      What Can Be Treated with REBT Therapy?

      REBT can be especially helpful for people with a variety of issues including:

      • Depression

      • Anxiety

      • Addiction

      • Phobias

      • Anger, Rage or Guilt

      • Procrastination

      • Aggression

      • Sleep problems

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